{Feel the Piece cut-out top, AG Jeans distressed jeans, Ray-Ban wayfarers, Manolo Blahnik d’Orsay flats, Prada handbag, Lola James Jewlery lariat, Mini Bright Ring c/o Tous, Bulgari Serpenti and B.Zero rings — hair by Cassie at Blo Midtown}
The other day, during a grueling Barry’s Bootcamp class, it hit me like a size of Double Ds that I’m amongst a handful of Miami girls with real-deal boobs. To be quite honest, oftentimes, I feel like The Last of the Real Mammary Mohicans.
Show me a lineup of women, and I can spot a boob job (even the really good ones handcrafted in Brazil) like a German Shepard on a cocaine hunt. So as I sweated amongst a sea of buoyant silicon and saline bags, I couldn’t help but feel, well, inadequate. My Bs — when strapped into an air-tight Lululemon sports bra — leaves me channeling a 12 year old. Yep, I look as flat as a Paris Hilton’s ass.
I also tend to get deliriously demented during these classes because I’m exhausted, cranky, hungry and can barely retain enough oxygen to support a heartbeat, so I started to obsess about my prepubescent-looking funbags. And for a split second, I cupped my breasts, pushed them toward my chin and envisioned them as perky, peppy, rotund and gelatinous as my fellow classmates.
But as I trudged along on that treadmill, restored my breath and mental clarity, it occurred to me that as much as I admire boob jobs, they’re just not for me. I worry I may set a poor example for my daughter. I fear one plastic surgery may spiral into a spate of additional surgeries. Besides, I’m scared shitless my highly conservative Greek mother would beat me with a spatula. Plus, I love going bra-less to Publix. And all those dresses hanging in my closet? They would never fit me again. AND THAT’S A LEGITIMATE TRAVESTY, I TELL YOU.
And no, I’m so not dogging boob jobs — I’m clearly jealous of them! But I don’t think I’m alone when I say they aren’t my cup of tea.
So in lieu of buying a fresh pair of tatas, I taped my hair extensions back in, you know, to quell the angst. To fill the proverbial void. To pick myself up. To placate any insecurities I’ve been facing as I grow older. In other words, often times a little change is enough to keep drastic measures at bay.
Long live the itty bitty titty committee. I’m perfect the way my mama made me.
Thx for snapping my pic, Regan Cleminson!
I keep going back and forth on the boob job question, but then again one should be happy with one self. Maybe I need a hair change like you 😀
XO
Gissi
I am among the flat chested (albeit real-boobed) South Floridians too girl! I think you look faboo and there is no need to change a THING! <3
I personally don't think big boobs are for me either. I am lazy and I like being able to go braless. I sometimes think a small upgrade, like a full B for example would be nice in a bikini and all, but is it worth going under anesthesia, the pain, the potential complications, and the need to go under repeatedly over the years to maintain them? For me, no. I just keep doing squats and build a booty. 😉
xx happy weekend mama!
Erika
Gissi, I’m not saying they aren’t for eveyone. But if you feel on the fence about it…wait. You’re heart should be in it 100%.
Erika, Preach! Embrace those bra-less wonders!
i’m with you sista
“like a German Shepard on a cocaine hunt!”
bahahaha i fell off my chair! xx
http://www.vicariousLA.com
Big boobs are not all they are cracked up to be. I would switch for a perfect B anyday!!
That’s a great message to share Maria! Especially in our town…takes a strong lady to not cave! (applause)
The grass isn’t always greener haha. Me going braless would be quite a show for those at the grocery store! — I say the hair extensions were a much better choice 🙂
“Itty bitty titty committee” brings back memories! Love the article and the extensions!!!! Xoxo!
To my fellow Mohican- I too am proud of my (39 yr old, two-baby-milked, saggy mom) boobs!!
THANK YOU on behalf of not only your daughter- but all the other little impressionable girls out there who are subjected to growing up amongst slutty Bratz dolls and plastic asses and body dysmorphia.
Hooray for shakin what Mother Nature gave ya!
X
You kill me. Come to the DR, I’m surrounded by the itty bitty community and proud.
LOL! Love it! I was never going to win a luscious boob contest, but after nursing 3 kids… we’ll let’s just say I would love to at least have the boobs I started high school with. 😉 And yes, living in South FL with perky plastics everywhere is giving me a complex. All that said, I’m with you girl. I worry about the influence it would have on my kids, and all the risks you mentioned. I would love the boob job minus all the cons. So in the end – I’m loving (or at least tolerating) my post-baby shrunk boobs & embracing an ever changing shade of brown hair (extensions are your medicine – hair color is mine).
I love all the dainty jewelry! That pearl & emerald pinky is to die for!!!! xx
Oh, boobs are so overrated! Long live our flat chest 🙂
p.s. and Ur amazing style!
xoxo
Anja
Hello, yup this post is really fastidious and I have learned lot of things from it regarding blogging.
thanks.
Really love your blog , quick fix & fun reading 🙂
You’re hilarious. When are we going to meet in real life?
I love Feel the Piece <3